As a parent of two young girl, it’s important to be prepared for the inevitable conversations about clothing choices you are likely to encounter over the years.
Most importantly, you will want to discuss how to dress appropriately with your daughter. This conversation can be tricky, but it’s important to have it early and often.
You’ll want to discuss how to dress appropriately for different occasions and help her understand why it’s important to dress modestly. Ultimately, you want your daughter to feel confident in her skin and know that she can wear whatever she feels comfortable in – as long as it’s not inappropriate for the occasion.
In this article, we are going to prepare you with helpful tips for talking with your daughter about how to dress appropriately.
Should Parents Control What their Child Wears?
Clothing is one of the ways that children first learn to express themselves. Many children enjoy the process of picking out their clothing for the day in a way that suits them and feels comfortable.
This often continues into older childhood and teen years when their opinions become stronger.
It’s important not to try to control what your child wears because this can be seen as a way of trying to stifle them or tell them that their opinion is less important.
If you notice your child is dressing inappropriately, there are ways to gently guide them to make a different choice without choosing for them.
This isn’t always easy and can create arguments, but it’s important. Doing so maintains an open dialogue about clothing choices to create a healthy attitude about it.
How Your Daughter Dresses Matters?
The way your daughter dresses is a big part of how she will be perceived in the world. It reflects her personality and creates the image she is putting out into the world.
Kids can be very judgemental and it would be doing your daughter a disservice to teach her otherwise. With that said, she should not be dressing for anyone else but herself.
As long as she is happy, comfortable, and appropriately dressed, let creativity reign (within reason).
How Do I Tell My Daughter To Dress Modestly?
Many girls, especially teenage girls, will attempt to push the boundaries of what is acceptable or appropriate to wear to places like school and family gatherings. You can start by explain to her this importants points:
- Teach her about to respect herself by setting a good example.
- Explain that self-respect is about valuing oneself for who we are, not what others think of us.
- Help your daughter build confidence in herself by praising her strengths and applauding her accomplishments.
- It is crucial to help her stand up for herself, so encourage your daughter to speak her mind assertively but respectfully.
- Focus on stressing inner beauty over physical appearance will promote a positive body image.
- Teach your daughter that she deserves to be treated with respect by others, and she should never tolerate being treated disrespectfully.
This is take you to a difficult and recurring conversation, but there are ways to talk through it with your daughter in a way that will be more impactful.
Here are some tips to talk to your daughter about dressing modestly:
Share Your Own Stories
Your daughter might not realize that you were once a kid too !
If you’re a mom, consider sharing stories from your own teenage years about times when you dressed inappropriately and felt uncomfortable or wished you’d chosen differently. This can be a powerful way to relate to your child without coming down too hard on them.
Ask Questions
When you notice your daughter is gravitating towards clothes that aren’t modest, start asking her questions.
Ask her why she chose that outfit. Ask her if she might feel comfortable in something else.
You might be surprised at what you learn from these types of questions. Maybe she’s trying to dress like older girls she knows from school or because she saw that it was trendy on social media.
These can help you tailor your approach in teaching her to dress modestly.
Avoid Judgemental Language
Although it feels easy to get frustrated or angry when talking about dressing appropriately or inappropriately, it’s important not to demonize either side. It can teach young girls to be unnecessarily judgemental of themselves or others by creating that sense of otherness.
Avoid using words like “slutty”, even with older girls. Stick to neutral terms like “inappropriate” and explain why you’re calling it that. Give examples of what is modest and what is not at a level that they can understand.
This should help get your point across in an informative way rather than a combative one.
How Do I Teach My Daughter To Respect Herself?
The best way to teach your daughter to respect herself is to model it for her. Make sure she is surrounded by female figures who respect themselves and always make it a point to respect her as well.
Kids, even teenagers, are always learning by observing what is around them so they are very susceptible to what they see in their environment.
Help your daughter to build confidence in herself
Talk about situations where you see girls who are not respecting themselves whether it’s on television or in real life. Make sure they understand what it means and why it’s so important.
This will open up the dialogue about it so she will feel comfortable talking with you about things like that.
There are many ways to teach your daughter modesty. Even if you’re trying to avoid the conversation or have been in it for years, there’s a way to work with her and your family dynamics.
Consider how she learns and talks about what is appropriate instead of just telling them what not to wear. This step can be one of the most important in her life.
