Nowadays, the importance of parenting in the development of a more just and egalitarian society is fundamental. Science has already proven that the involvement of parents in the education of their children is extremely important.
They also say that having a child is similar to starting a business: A person needs to dedicate hours of attention and effort so it grows in a healthy way in the future.
Parenting is physically, mentally, emotionally, and financially draining, and to say that it’s a difficult job is an understatement. When does parenting get less exhausting? Can it even get less exhausting?
Why Is Being A Parent So Exhausting?
Your children heavily rely on you. From the moment they are born to the moment they first learn to walk. In everything they will do, they will need your support whether it’s emotionally, physically, or financially.
This is the main reason why being a parent is exhausting. It’s because your life is not only about you anymore. It now includes your children who will depend on you their entire lives.
Parenthood Is Physically Exhausting
Being a parent can be physically exhausting especially after childbirth and for first time parents. For infants, you need to feed them, change their diapers, stop them from crying, get them to sleep, and play with them.
This is the stage where sleepless nights become your normal routine. In early childhood, it’s crucial to guide them in their learning process because this is the time when they get curious about everything.
You think your duty as a parent stops when they enter preschool but the worse is yet to come as they get to know more about the outside world.
Parenthood Is Emotionally Exhausting
According to the American Psychological Association parenting practices all around the world share three main goals: to ensure the safety of children, prepare them for life and pass on cultural values to them.
The development of the child will greatly depend on parents. Did you know that mental health problems in adults are most of the time caused by undesirable childhood experiences? Parents are expected to be involved in every developmental stage of the child.
All these expectations are pressures for parents which may cause anxiety on whether their parenting is effective or not. Depression will take over the moment they feel they fail.
What Is The Most Exhausting Age To Parent?
According to parents.com, children who are 8 years old are the most exhausting. The result of their survey is surprising but it’s the truth for the 2000 parents they asked.
Middle childhood or ages 6-12 is characterized by the development of mental skills. This is the stage where your child forms social relationships that will help them in adulthood. Their concern is more for others and not for themselves.
Also, they learn how to express their thoughts and feelings in a much better way. This is the stage where they are nearing puberty so expect that your child will have frequent mood swings and lots of attitude.
As they get to know more about others and the outside world, they will spend more time outside your house. They will start to complain and roll their eyes at you if you don’t let them play and hang out with their friends.
It’s the stage where their reasoning develops and they will use that to go against you. Eight years olds will really test your patience and limits.
Does Being A Parent Ever Get Easier?
When does parenting get less exhausting? Does it get easier? Let’s accept the truth here. Parenting will never get easy. The belief that parenting will get easier when your children get married is a myth.
In fact, that’s probably the second time you said that. You already said life would get easier for you when your child leaves home at 18 but it didn’t happen. They still called you for their problems, even stressed out by their childish behaviors.
Why Parenthood Will Never Get Easy
As your child grows there are 7 stages of development (infancy, early childhood, middle childhood, adolescence, early adulthood, middle adulthood, and old age). During this time their needs, growth, and challenges change. Every change they encounter needs your attention. Parents always want to witness every aspect of their development so they can provide support.
Do not expect that these developments are always adorable. As they become curious, form relationships, and start creating their own worlds, they will become more difficult to control and be a source of headaches most of the time.
You probably thought that parenting will get easier for your second child or your third child because you believe you have already mastered the art of parenting from your first child.
But sorry to tell you it won’t happen. Every child is unique and develops at a different pace so expect that your second-born child will act differently from your first-born child thus requiring a different approach in parenting.
How Can Parents Avoid Parental Burnout
This is the part where you probably have accepted that parenting will forever be a difficult task and you can’t do anything about it. But tell you what, you can do something about the stress, emotional, mental, and physical impact of parenting. Take a look at these 5 simple strategies on how to avoid parental burnout.
1. Acknowledge that Parental Burnout Is Real
Stop fooling yourself with thoughts of ‘Getting tired parenting your child is normal’ or ‘I can’t get tired because my family needs me’ or even ‘There is no such thing as parental burnout, it’s all a part of life’. Stop! This is self-torture.
Of course, you have responsibilities to fulfill for your family but superheroes don’t exist. You are human and capable of getting tired both physically and emotionally.
2. Care for Yourself Too
How can you give something you don’t have? How can you care for your family when you can’t even care for yourself? Who will take care of them when you get sick? Take advantage of the time when your children are away from you.
Go out and treat yourself to a spa or pamper yourself because you deserve it. Give yourself time to just slow down and relax.
3. Express Your Feelings
Repressing all your stress and negative feelings will do you no good. There is a risk of that suddenly exploding, making you do things you don’t normally do like, hitting your child or suddenly shouting at your kids.
You can let that out by talking to them in a nice way on how to do things properly so you make life easy for the both of you.
4. Positive Mindset
Childrearing will be a burden if you tell your mind it’s a burden. You were once a child too and all your accomplishments and who you are today are made possible by your parents’ effective parenting. How you bring up your child will be your ultimate accomplishment in life.
5. Get Some Support
You provide support for your children but you yourself need some support as well. Talk to someone about the struggles you have parenting your child. It can be with your friends or relatives.
Doing so, you will not only lessen the emotions you may be feeling, but you may also gain their understanding, and might even get some advice.
