If you’re married, chances are you’ve been asked this question before: “How often do you guys go out without each other?” And, if you’re like most couples, the answer is probably “not often enough.”
But should married couples go out without each other more often?
We found that most couples think it’s important to go out without each other at least once a week and that it’s even more important to go out without each other if they have kids. In fact, couples with kids were twice as likely to say that going out without each other is very important.
How Often Should Married Couples Go Out Separately?
Interestingly, we found that the majority of couples who went out without each other more than once a week said it was because they enjoyed their own company more than their spouse’s.
When it comes to a couple’s relationship, it’s important to spend time together. Spending too much time apart can lead to toxic behaviors creeping into the relationship.
Why Is Alone Time Essential in a Partnership?
However, there are times when both partners need to be alone or spend time doing something separate. Those times should be discussed in advance, to make sure both parties are happy with the arrangement.
Going out separately is a great way to keep the spark alive in your marriage. Here are some reasons why you and your spouse should carve out some time for each other outside your relationship.
How often is it too often for married couples to go out without each other?
While the desire to spend time together is natural, time apart can benefit a marriage relationship. It allows each partner to pursue their interests and socialize.
This also helps prevent boredom and gives the couple new things to discuss when they return. The time spent apart is as important as the time spent together.
It can be challenging to find time to spend alone with your partner. However, it’s important to take time for yourself as well. Make sure you spend a night out with your best friend each week. You can also join a recurring event that allows you to talk about your day.
According to relationship experts Trina Dolenz and Garett Coan, marriages stay happy and healthy when each spouse has one weekly “friend date.”
Most couples today do not spend enough time alone or with others or other pursuits,” both say. They think being apart brings new experiences and ideas back into the relationship, along with vitality and oxygen,” Dolenz explains.
It Can Recharge Your Relationship
When each partner takes time for themselves to recharge, they come back home feeling refreshed and can contribute positively to the relationship.
According to Coan, couples should try to spend 70% of their time together and 30% apart. This gives each person enough freedom to do things they’re interested in while still being connected to their partner.
What are some benefits of occasionally going out separately from your spouse?
It’s a common misconception that you must spend all your time with your partner to be a good spouse. However, research shows that spending time apart can benefit marriages.
Here are some reasons why you and your spouse should carve out some time for each other outside of your relationship.
- Allows for individual interests to be explored
- Gives a break from each other and can miss them
- Can prevent boredom in the relationship
- Creates new stories and experiences to share when together
- Can recharge the relationship
- Each person has more time for themselves
- To Rekindle With Your Own Voice
- To Have the Time to Tend to Your Other Relationships
- To Accomplish Your Own Goals
- To Improve Your Romantic Relationship
Are there any potential downsides to going out without your spouse?
While there are many benefits to going out without your spouse, there are a few potential downsides to consider as well. Here are some:
- Loss of intimacy
- Can damage trust
- Less time spent together
- Misses important conversations/ events
- Can lead to feeling neglected/ unimportant
- May be expensive
- One spouse may feel like they always have to entertain the other
- May be disruptive to family life/ schedules
- May require more effort to plan/ communicate
If one of the partners is consistently going out without the other, it could create feelings of resentment.
It’s important to make sure you’re both getting enough time for yourselves. If one person is going out several times a week while the other stays home, that’s probably not going to work well in the long run.
Another potential downside is that if you’re always doing your own thing, you may start to grow apart from your spouse. It’s important to make sure you’re still spending quality time together when you’re not out with friends.
Finally, if you’re going out without your spouse all the time, it may be difficult to find things to talk about when you’re together. Make sure you’re sharing stories and experiences from your time apart so you can connect with each other on a deeper level.
Even though there are a few potential downsides to going out without your spouse, the benefits outweigh the negatives. Spending time apart can help improve your relationship in many ways. So go ahead and make plans with your friends – your marriage will thank you for it!
There are a few ways to make sure you’re spending enough time apart from each other. One way is to schedule in “friend dates” where you each spend time with your own friends.
Another way is to take turns going out on weekends so you each get a chance to have some time to yourselves.
Whatever you do, make sure you’re both getting enough time for yourselves. It’s important to remember that going out without your spouse doesn’t mean you love them any less. In fact, it can actually help improve your relationship!
There are many benefits to going out without your spouse. It can help you stay connected to your friends, maintain your hobbies, and relieve stress.
It can also give you time to miss each other and remember why you’re together in the first place.
How can you ensure you’re both getting the time and space you need without feeling like you’re neglecting your relationship?
It’s important to remember that going out without your spouse doesn’t mean you love them any less. On the contrary, it can help improve your relationship!
Ensure to address the topic with respect and kindness
It won’t work if your spouse feels you’re pressuring him to talk about it or if you’re putting your friends first.
Suppose your partner seizes the opportunity to be alone instead of pining for you while you’re gone (even if it’s just for a couple hours). In that case, they will develop individuality and independence, which are great qualities.
Respecting your partner’s space is essential. It means that even though you may be happy and don’t need time alone right now, that doesn’t mean you should disrespect their need for time apart.
They did this for you, and it’s important to return the favor. Be sure to come to a compromise that will work for both of you.
Setting a schedule is key to spending your time wisely.
When planning to go out with friends without your partner, let them know in advance, and try not to leave them hanging. This way, they don’t feel like you’re just trying to ditch them last minute.
You don’t want the time you spend independently to be wasted. Time is precious and should stand for something. That means you should set aside time to establish your routine to anticipate what you’ll be doing at all times, balancing alone time in a relationship with everything else.
It wouldn’t be normal if married couples didn’t go out separately
Reconnecting with close friends can be a great way to improve your relationship.
In a relationship, becoming isolated is common and consuming all your time with that person. Therefore, friendships are vital; they provide much-needed alone time outside the relationship.
When you have more time on your hands, it’s an excellent opportunity to catch up with old friends. It’s normal to want and maintain friendships outside of those who are mutual friends with your partner.
These relationships can provide sound advice and opinions on relationship troubles.
How Much Time Should Married Couples Spend Apart?
According to the Office for National Statistics, couples spend about two and a half hours together every day, and that number is even higher on weekends.
However, this does not mean that they should not spend time apart and catch up on their lives. It is better to spend some time apart than to be completely smothered by your partner.
It is important for couples to spend time apart and together, but too much of either will lead to conflict. The amount of time spent apart and together depends on the preferences and needs of each partner.
For couples who like a lot of attention, a little bit of time apart is healthy. However, a good balance will allow both partners to feel secure and centered.
Each couple’s dynamics are different, so there’s no definitive answer. However, trial and error will help you figure out what works best for you and your partner!
Some partners will run errands to get out of the house. While this can be beneficial for some couples, it may not be the best solution for others. Ideally, couples should spend at least two weeks apart.
Is It Important For Couples To Do Things Together?
If you are married and want to maintain the intimacy in your relationship, it is important to spend time together. Even if you have a busy schedule, you can still find time for each other. You can go shopping or dine out, or spend some time in the pool, playing sports or doing your favorite hobby together.
There are many different ways to keep your relationship fresh and interesting. You can try a new restaurant, a cuisine you’ve never tried before, or even drive to a different coffee shop to talk about life.
You can also spend time going through old family photos and telling stories about your past. You can even volunteer for the same good cause, or spend some time volunteering together.
This is the reason for being in a relationship; to be with your best friend and to have someone to do things together in life. It is one of the most important things you can do to keep your relationship alive and strong.
Are Couples Supposed To Do Everything Together?
When a couple first gets married, they often want to do everything together. The idea behind this is that the shared pursuits will keep the couple connected and create memories.
Otherwise, they will drift apart. Doing things together is an excellent way to maintain the bond and avoid a rocky relationship.
Does marriage mean that two people do everything together?
A couple that spends all their time together may eventually get on each other’s nerves. However, doing everything together is unnecessary for a strong and healthy relationship.
A relationship can last if both partners know how to balance their time spent together and apart.
Final Thoughts
Although going out separately can be healthy for a married couple, it’s important that the two of you agree to this first. If one partner is unhappy with the separation, you should have a good talk and see if you can resolve the issues.
You should also take the time to socialize with your friends. Going out without your partner can prevent boredom and give you new topics to discuss when you’re back together.
So, there you have it! It’s important to go out without your spouse every once in a while, and it seems like most couples think so too. But remember to communicate with your spouse about your plans, so they’re not left in the dark!
Thanks for reading!
